(There's more to this, but that's a whole 'nother story, for another time.)
Often, those who give off mixed signals have avoidant attachment styles, a learned coping strategy where the person shies away from closeness and intimacy because it makes them uncomfortable. Mixed signals can definitely mean that the other person isn’t going all in on you, but that’s not the only answer at play. (Cue eyeroll.)īefore you tap that unfollow button, a quick disclaimer: “Everyone’s experience is different,” says Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT, relationship therapist and founder of Modern Love Counseling. “It’s a way to say, ‘I’m not totally sure I am into your or not.’ Or, ‘I’m not sure if we want the same thing here.” Either way, mixed signals can be used to slow down the pace of the relationship without actually talking about it. “Usually, it’s used to create distance,” Feuerman says. Mixed signals can simply be a miscommunication-or they can be an excuse to hold you at arm's length because they don’t want to commit (or make you believe that they are ready to). It just means the other person has a lot to straighten out, and the mess affects you. Keep in mind, you’re not to blame for being on the receiving end of confusing messages. “Ultimately, the antidote is to pay attention to the actions more than the words.” Deciphering mixed messages is a long game of “they love me, they love me not”.and no one has time for that ish.
“Mixed signals are negative signals in disguise,” says marriage and couples therapist Marni Feuerman, PsyD, author of Ghosted and Breadcrumbed, Stop Falling for Unavailable Men and Get Smart About Healthy Relationships. “Mixed signals are negative signals in disguise.”
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